Today I'm going to show you how to choose happiness without feeling like you're letting everyone else down. I remember writing my pros and cons list. “Should I stay in this marriage or should I get a divorce?”, like it was yesterday. It was such an emotional time in my life. And you know, your emotions are all tied to physical feelings in your body. And the more emotional or traumatic the experience was, the more clearly, we tend to remember how those things went.
I can remember it like it was yesterday. And I remember writing my list. Should I stay in this marriage or should I get a divorce? And everything that I wrote down, no matter what it was, there was nothing that made me feel happy.
I knew, if I stayed in the marriage, it would benefit the kids because mom and dad would still be together. Well, that didn't make me feel happy. If I decided to get a divorce, I felt like it would be so traumatic for everyone. And that didn't make me happy. And no matter what I wrote down, nothing made me happy.
I've learned something since then, and I've learned that true happiness is an internal feeling as well as a way of being. Read that last part again. IT IS A WAY OF BEING.
I am happy to be alive. I'm happy to be this amazing spirit inside my physical body for however many years, hopefully 108 years. But we don't know. I'm just really happy to be here. No one can take that away from me and no one can give that to me.
Now, this is a huge distinction here. Pleasure and happiness often get mixed up. Pleasure, we can get from things, we can get from people and in moments. It is quick and it's short lived and is short term.
You can eat a delicious ice cream cone and have great pleasure in eating the ice cream cone. You can go to the beach with friends and have lots of pleasure doing that. But you see many people do these kinds of things, and they aren't happy. They're experiencing short bursts of pleasure here and there, but they're not happy.
As you begin to do this work, what I want for you, is to find and create that happiness inside of you that no one can ever take away and no one can ever give you. You just are happy. And it is a choice. You have the power to just choose to be happy. You just have to decide. You just have to make that decision and choose happiness.
Elevate your life's game by making happiness your default setting. This choice isn't just a fleeting emotion, but a fierce commitment to living your best life. Embrace joy as your birthright, and watch the effect it has on transforming moments into fulfillment and purpose.
You can choose to look on the bright side. You can choose to be optimistic. You can choose to say yes when you want to and no when you don't want to. And you can be happy with your choice.
There's a couple of things that I do, and I suggest that you do too, that can help to increase your happiness, your feeling of joy and worthiness and love and happiness and self-acceptance.
Exercise number one is to practice gratitude. Every day write down in your journal whether it's morning or evening, whatever time works best for you. Five to ten things that you are grateful for. Soon you're just going to look around throughout the day and say, “Wow, I'm grateful for that!” Or “Wow, that's cool that I saw that!”. “I’m so awesome and grateful for that”. Start with just five or ten things that you're grateful for, and they can be small, little tiny things. You're grateful to wake up in the morning. And that's not really a small thing. I mean, it's a huge thing. You're grateful for yourself. You're grateful, you get it. Find just five things that you're grateful for and start to live that life in the gratitude that helps to create happiness inside yourself watch the moments of fulfillment become more and more frequent. Then that's what you'll attract into your life. You'll attract more of it. So that's exercise number one.
Exercise number two is to practice self-acceptance. In the morning or at night, get naked in your bathroom. Look in the mirror. Start at the top of your head and look all the way down your body and say to yourself, I am worthy, I am love, I am grateful. I accept all of me. And as you're looking down your body, you might see some things that you don't love. And that's okay. You can exercise, change your diet, you can do all these things. That's fine.
Happiness and self-acceptance does not mean that you no longer want to make changes or that you don't want to grow. It just means that, you're growing. You accept who you are and you choose to be happy.
I hope you get started with these two exercises and start to see the impact it can have on your joy and deep happiness. And I want you to remember that you are worthy, you are loved, you can choose happiness and you are not alone.
And until next time here's to youfirst!
Wendy
xo