So how do we thrive through divorce? How do we thrive through one of the most challenging times a person could ever face in their life? Going through a divorce can be a challenging time, but it's important during this transition, to focus on self-care and personal growth.
There are six specific areas that I suggest you take a look at. Be real and honest with where you're at right now and consider where you want to be five or ten years from now. Look at these areas with your eyes wide open and this will help you to journey through this very difficult transition in a more graceful, clear compassionate and joyful way.
Number One: Your Family and household. Amidst the challenges of divorce, it's important to focus on nurturing your family and maintaining a stable household. Prioritize open and honest communication with your family members, ensuring that everyone feels heard and supported. Establish routines and structure to provide stability. Collaborate with your ex-partner to create a co-parenting plan that puts the best interests of your children first. Foster a positive and nurturing atmosphere where everyone feels valued and respected, fostering a sense of unity and strength within your family unit.
Number Two: Your children. Prioritize their well-being throughout the divorce process. Maintain open and honest communication with them, assuring them that the divorce is not their fault and that they are loved. Create a stable and consistent routine to provide them with a sense of security.
Listen to their concerns and emotions. Co-parenting effectively, with clear communication and shared responsibilities, is crucial for their emotional stability. Make their well-being a top priority and seek professional guidance when needed.
Number Three: Your finances. Divorce often brings financial changes, so it's crucial to regain control over your finances. Start by creating a budget that outlines your income, expenses, and debt obligations. Consider consulting a financial advisor who can help you understand the financial implications of the divorce and assist in developing a plan for the future. Look for ways to cut expenses, save money, and create a financial safety net. By taking control of your finances, you can alleviate stress and set the foundation for a stable future.
Number Four: Your community and civic engagement. While going through a divorce, engaging in civic activities can provide a sense of purpose, connection, and contribute to your personal growth. Consider volunteering for local community organizations or non-profits that align with your values and interests. Participate in neighborhood meetings, town hall events, or community initiatives to have a voice in shaping your community. Joining advocacy groups or getting involved in causes that are important to you can give you a sense of empowerment and make a positive impact.
Number Five: Your physical and mental health. Taking care of your physical health is essential during this challenging time. Regular exercise not only helps to boost your mood but also releases endorphins, which can help alleviate stress and anxiety. Consider activities such as walking, jogging, yoga, or any form of exercise that you enjoy. Also, going through a divorce can stir up a range of emotions, so it's crucial to prioritize your emotional well-being. Seek support from trusted friends, family, or a therapist who can provide a safe space for you to express and process your feelings. Practice self-care activities like journaling, meditation, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy and peace. Developing healthy coping mechanisms and self-awareness will contribute to your overall emotional healing.
And number Six: Your Social life. Nurturing a healthy social life can provide much-needed support and companionship during a divorce. Engage in activities that bring you joy, whether it's joining clubs, volunteering, or participating in hobbies. Seek out support groups or therapy groups specifically tailored to individuals experiencing divorce. Building new friendships and connections can offer fresh perspectives and emotional support. Remember to maintain healthy boundaries and surround yourself with positive influences who uplift and encourage you during this transitional phase.
Remember that everyone's experience with divorce is unique, and it's important to give yourself time and patience as you navigate this period of transition. Seek professional advice and support when needed, and focus on personal growth, healing, and building a brighter future for yourself and your children.
Look carefully at each of these areas. You need to be diligent and clear regarding what's important within each of these areas of your life. What resources might you need? Who do you need to help you out with certain things? Where can you find the information? How can you be at your best while transitioning through each of these areas in your life. And what are you missing? And what do you want each area to look like one year from now, five years from now, ten years from now. And how do you want each of these areas in your life to look when you're living your best life?
Create a plan, and create that plan with your vision in mind as your best self. And slowly, one step at a time, make changes and improvements in each of these areas of your life.
I have helped countless women walk down that path with their vision in mind, helping them to make decisions that bring about their best self along the way to improve each of these areas of their lives. You can also start to develop wise changes with the focus of your best life as the end result, and with the flexibility to make changes in each area at any time.
This is your life. These are your decisions. This is your journey through divorce. And each journey through divorce is different, is unique. Only you know what's best for you and for your family. Be real with how your life looks in each of these areas. For example, consider your money and your finances. If you don't know how much money's coming in or how much money's going out. Maybe you create a budget. Maybe you start to track, write things down, get organized, get real, and move forward.
Identifying your fears and facing them head on is one of the best gifts you can give to yourself. You can move forward with your vision in mind.
If you've identified your fears and you just go for it, make a plan. Find the knowledge. Find the people that can help you out. Know what's going to get in your way and keep going. One small step at a time. Keeping track of these areas in your life. Assessing each as you move forward. Maybe every three months. Look at them again.
It will help you to see where you were, where you are now, where you're going, and ultimately, it will bring a sense of fulfilment and satisfaction.
This time is brutal. It's challenging. Divorce is not easy because it's it affects your heart. It affects your children. It's emotional. it's scary. But if you have these areas of your life in mind, along with your vision and your focus, it will help.
And until next time here's to youfirst!
Wendy
xo